WHAT IF

My musings over Sophie's letter to Claire...



"What" and "If"
two words as nonthreatening as words come.
But put them together side-by-side
and they have the power to haunt you
for the rest of your life...
"What if?"


A past relationship left me with no "What Ifs" (Thank God!). Looking back (and believing I'm much more mature now), I can say both parties tried every possible option to make it last. We really fought hard for it (yes, ala-Romeo & Juliet). In the end, after working on all the "What ifs" we could think of, it became too clear, ours was a beautiful relationship but it came with an expiration date.


I don't know how your story ended.
But I know that if what you felt then was love - true love -
then it's never too late.
If it was true then
why wouldn't it be true now?
You need only the courage to follow your heart...


After watching the film with my dear hubby, J,
we both came up with the same What If.
What if he died May 28, 2004?
Yes, we can be morbid. We're weird that way.

Would I have survived the tragedy?
Would I have married someone else?
Or would I have chosen to stay single?

It started a night-long conversation of woulda, coulda, shouldas but I'll keep the details private. *wink*

We almost lost each other six years ago (see my "Do You Believe In Miracles?" blog entry). We don't want to be haunted by What Ifs so we live each day to the fullest, we love each other to the max. Our love rule: All or Nothing.


I don't know what a love like that feels like...
a love to leave loved ones for,
a love to cross oceans for...
but I'd like to believe if I ever felt it,
I'd have the courage to seize it.
I hope you had the courage to seize it, Claire.
And if you didn't, I hope one day you will.


One of my greatest blessings: living the kind of love some people just dream of.

Like I always say, I may not be rich, famous or powerful, but having my loved ones -- J and my family -- around me is proof that I DO HAVE IT ALL!